Hey guys, it’s Coolin ! I’m back! Hope everyone has had an amazing week , and Friday!! It’s almost the weekend! Valentine’s Day Weekend .. and long weekend!! .. any big plans for it?! Let me know, down below!! Before I carry on into my posts, I’ll say this - You’re not obligated to read all of my post(s). Read til your heart desires, find what you need, and be happy! Thank you for all the feedback, comments, support you’ve given me. Here’s the new cards and event for today!! Thanks EA! — Syn Abbreviation Guide —
Silver Master Icons
Jari Kurri - 91 OVR - EDM / RW - BAR2 , HOW2 Peter Statsny - 91 OVR - NOR / C - H and S2 , PP2 Steve Yzerman - 92 OVR - DET / C - SWA2 , GLA2 Uses 9 Icon Collectables —-
BLOCKBUSTERS
Available for 1 week. MSPs are Pullable throughout Event Time of 2 weeks. Chris Didomenico - 94 OVR - RW - SPE2 , BAR1 , SWA1or SPA2 , HOW1 , MAG1 Mike Fisher - 94 OVR - C - SWA2 , PP1 , SPE1or HOW2 , DIS1 , H and S1 Marc Andre Fleury - 94 OVR - G - SWA2 , BAR1 , BAL1 **or H and S2 , SPA1 , DIS1 Jack Johnson - 94 OVR - LD - SPA2 , MAG1 , SH1or WM2 , DIS1 , SWA1 Phil Kessel - 94 OVR - LW - BAL2 , SH1 , GLA1or LTL2 , H and S1 , SPA1 Eric Lindros - 94 OVR - C - DIS2 , WM1 , T1or WH2 , BAR1 , SWA1 Shea Weber - 94 OVR - RD - SH2 , SWA1 , BAL1 ——- Chris Didomenico - 93 OVR - SPA1 , HOW1 , MAG1 Mike Fisher - 93 OVR - SWA1 , PP1 , SPE1 Marc Andre Fleury - 93 OVR - H and S1 , SPA1 , DIS1 Jack Johnson - 93 OVR - SPA1 , MAG1 , SH1 Phil Kessel - 93 OVR - BAL1 , SH1 , GLA1 Eric Lindros - 93 OVR - DIS1 , WM1 , T1 Shea Weber - 93 OVR - DIS1 , PP1 , LTL1 —— Taylor Hall - 92 OVR - NJD / LW - BAR1 , PP2 Jay Bouwmeester - 91 OVR - CGY / LD - SPA1 , WH2 Chris Didomenico - 91 OVR - FRI / RW - HOW1 , MAG1 Mike Fisher - 91 OVR - NAS / C - PP1 , SPE1 Marc Andre Fleury - 91 OVR - LVK / G - SPA1 , DIS1 Jack Johnson - 91 OVR - NYR / LD - MAG1 , SH1 Phil Kessel - 91 OVR - BOS / RW - SH1 , GLA1 Eric Lindros - 91 OVR - PHI / C - WM1 , T1 Shea Weber - 91 OVR - MTL / RD - PP1 , LTL1 Pierre-Luc Dubois - 90 OVR - WPJ / C - SPA1 , WM2 Seth Jones - 90 OVR - CBJ / RD - DIS1 , GLA2 Chris Didomenico - 90 OVR - SCL / RW - HOW1 , MAG1 Mike Fisher - 89 OVR - OTT / C - PP1 , SPE1 ... happy he got a card!!! Marc Andre Fleury - 89 OVR - PEN / G - SPA1 , DIS1 Jean Sebastian Gigure - 89 OVR - COL / G - BAR1 , SPA2 Jack Johnson - 89 OVR - PEN / LD - MAG1 , SH1 Phil Kessel - 89 OVR - TOR / RW - SH1 , GLA1 Eric Lindros - 89 OVR - NYR / C - WM1 , T1 Petr Mrazek - 89 OVR - PHI / G - SWA1 , SPE1 Shea Weber - 89 OVR - NAS / RD - PP1 , LTL1 Keith Yandle - 89 OVR - NYR / LD - BAR1 , SH2 Bryan Berard - 88 OVR - TOR / LD - SPA1 , HOW2 Todd Bertuzzi - 88 OVR - FLA / RW - DIS1 , WM2 Milan Lucic - 88 OVR - EDM / LW - BAL1 , WH2 Jimmy Carson - 87 OVR - DET / C - H and S1 , SPE2 Chris Didomenico - 87 OVR - OTT / RW - MAG1 , HOW1 Mike Fisher - 87 OVR - EVZ / C - PP1 , SPE1 Marc ANdre Fleury - 87 OVR - (A)PEN / G - SPA1 , DIS1 Jack Johnson - 87 OVR - CBJ / LD - MAG1 , SH1 Phil Kessel - 87 OVR - PEN / RW - SH1 , GLA1 Eric Lindros - 87 OVR - TOR / C - WM1 , T1 Gustav Nyquist - 87 OVR - SJS / RW - DIS1 , LTL2 Gary Roberts - 87 OVR - CAR / LW - DIS1 , GLA2 Alexander Steen - 87 OVR - STL / LW - H and S1 , WH2 Shea Weber - 87 OVR - ADM / RD - PP1 , LTL1 Matthew Barnaby - 87 OVR - PEN / RW - SWA1 , GLA2 Joel Otto - 86 OVR - PHI / C - DIS1 , WM2 Jean Gabriel Pageau - 86 OVR - NYI / C - SPA1 , MAG1 Chris Didomenico - 85 OVR - ICE / RW - MAG1 Mike Fisher - 85 OVR - WOL / C - SPE1 Marc Andre Fleury - 85 OVR - EAG / G - DIS1 Jack Johnson - 85 OVR - LAK / LD - SH1 Phil Kessel - 85 OVR - PHI / RW - GLA1 Eric Lindros - 85 OVR - (A)DAL - C - T1 Luke Schenn - 85 OVR - LAK / RD - BAR1 , SPE2 Shea Weber - 85 OVR - ROC / RD - LTL1 Nikita Zadorov - 85 OVR - CHI / LD - SWA1 , SH2 Devan Dubnyk - 83 OVR - MIN / G - DIS1 , H and S2
Primetimes
Available for 24 HR Cards / Til Monday at 5PM (on weekends)
NHL
Mark Giordano - 90 OVR - CGY / LD - LTL1 , SH1 John Gibson - 89 OVR - ANA / G - H and S1 Drew Doughty - 88 OVR - LAK / RD - WM1 , WH1 Sebastian Aho - 88 OVR - CAR / C - PP1 , LTL1 Connor Hellebuyck - 87 OVR - WPJ / G - DIS1 , SWA1 Brian Rust - 86 OVR - PEN / RD - SPE1 , MAG1 Cam Atkinson - 85 OVR - CBJ / RW - GLA1 , WM1 Aaron Ekblad - 85 OVR - FLA / RD - HOW1 , SH1 Jacob Markstrom - 85 OVR - CGY / G - BAL1 , BAR1 Alexander Wenneberg - 84 OVR - FLA / C - T1 , WM1 Michael Del Zotto - 83 OVR - CBJ / LD - HOW1 , PP1 Jujhar Khaira - 81 OVR - EDM / C - SPE1 , MAG1 ——-
End Note - For Those Just Viewing Cards
If you wish to opt out of reading
Hope you have an amazing day / night!! Take Care!!
Event Packs • Just Found Out On TV (UT) - 85k C / 1.7 P 15 items, including GC, a guaranteed 84+ OVR Player Item • First Game With a New Team Daily Pack - 42.5k C - 850 P 30 items, at least 20 players with one 82+ OVR Player Item • The Blockbuster Blowout Pack - 17.5k C / 350 P 25 items, at least 8 players with 2 or better players Availlable until Monday at 5pm EST • New Flame Pack (UT) - 110k C / 2.2k P 15 items , at least 8 Gold Players including a guaranteed Gold Collectable and Icon Collectable • Heart of Gold - 42.5k C / 850 P 30 item, at least 10 gold player, including a guaranteed 83+ OVR Player • Love ❤️ you forever pack - 25k C / 500 P 18 items, at least 5 NHL Players including a guaranteed 80+ OVR Player Item
Sets
• Love 💕 You Hockey Sets
100 Gold Players - Recieve 3 Icon Collectables
75 Gold Players - 86 Bronze Master Icon
FURTHER READING — IF YOU WISH TO CONTINUE !
ITS NOT OBLIGATED!! DO WHATEVER YOU WISH! Bye !!! if you wish to stop reading :) ——
• LONG WEEKEND !!! • Valentine’s Day - February 14 • Family Day - February 15 ————— ———— —— ———
IMPORTANT NOTICE
Sometimes you just need to get off the grid to let your soul right. Social Media chews up a lot of our time.. — the average person stares at their phone for 3 and half hours per day. You might think “oh , thats not so bad” .... but to put that into perspective, that is 24.5 hours in a singular week. Now times that by 4, to get how much you would spend in a month. 98 hours. — 4 days essentially. If we times those 4 days, by 12 we get a shocking 48 days. Quick Maths 48 days out of 365 days doesn’t seem like a lot, no? It turns out to 13% of the entire year. The reasoning on why I mention this is to show you that all that “little” time adds up... Life is too short to stare at a screen - try and put a timer on your Social Medias / Phone in general if you’re worried that your phone usage is being or becoming an addiction! ——
Interested in Stocks?
EA’s Stock Price, after hours - Feb 12 $ 147.76 (usd) —- Currency Converter we looked at the stock at $137.54 usd —— That is a difference of ( $10.22 / 7.43% ) — Disclaimer - I am not a financial advisor. It is your money, please do your own due diligence. I am not responsible for your money. This is *not** advice. I added this section for an added educational purposes only. Thanks* —— —— —— —-
NEED A SOUNDTRACK TO LISTEN TO?
I made this for everyone. I’ll update it whenever I feel like it, but its been often!
WE’RE AT 1400+ SONGS! WOW! How are you not listening to this playlist already!? Comment songs to add, and please give feedback! It’s much appreciated!! I currently have “Glad You Exist” by “Dan + Shay” stuck in my head.... which you can play, recently added to the playlist! ———-
Don’t feel scared to click here. Winning is SO much louder than losing. Know that you are NEVER alone. We are all here for eachother, and it is never too late to get help. I am here for you. This is a VERY important thread, especially if you are new to HUT. Here! ——- 43 / 365 —— —— —— —- —- ——- —- —— —— Thanks for reading. I’m always welcome to feedback, please let me know what I can improve on. If there’s anything missing, please let me know! Take care, happy gaming! HAPPY NATIONAL NO ONE EATS ALONE DAY • Coolin Killin It (Life is like a puzzle, you just have to find the right piece.)
Long post ahead. I'm originally from the central north of the PH, where the seas meet the mountains however my previous work was located in another city which is two hours away from my hometown by that means, I had to rent a room (most likely a dorm as the building is close to a university) to save time from traveling. The landlord (let’s call him Dan) informed me that a new lady will move and share a room with me. No biggie. I have a bunk bed and she could use the upper bed, anyway I’ve been living alone in the room for quite some time. Dan added that the lady was also an old tenant in their building. No problem with that part. I thought, at least they have known her even before. Finally, this lively and bubbly lady moved in. She introduced herself as Nica - 5”1 tall, chubby, with a jolly voice. From what I have learned, she was older than me, she was a single mother originally residing from a city near my hometown and she worked in a call center near a casino. The latter distracted me since I knew there was no BPO establishment near the casino. I shrugged it off because maybe she knew it better than me. The first few days or probably a week of her stay was OK, she goes to work then home, and maybe some night out since my alarm goes off at 3am and she arrived at the same time. Then there was one time, I arrived around 8 in the evening from my hometown since I spent my two-day off there and she was in her space doing her own thing. I then took out my DLSR camera which I brought with me since my boyfriend and I were planning an out of town trip on my next off. I started to clean the camera as I spotted dust on the lens when suddenly Nica interrupted by asking, from where did I bought the camera, how much, how to use it, and so on. I answered as she seemed very interested. Two or three days after that camera Q and A, Nica mentioned that she will spend her day off and probably Christmas in her hometown which was OK as always to me. On the day that Nica is set to leave for her hometown, I was on my last shift for the week. So on the same day, I and my friends planned a post-shift early Christmas celebration in Central Park (it's a hotel with a pool and drinks on the rooftop). The original plan was to go directly to the place right after our shift (around 2PM local time). But I told them to move it around 4PM so at least we have time to rest and retouch. I also mentioned that I’ll bring my camera. Who wouldn’t like good photos right? So here it goes, as soon as I unlocked our room, I just felt something was off. Nica already left as she was not there. I wasn’t able to identify which was which so to validate what I was feeling, I stand on the doorway and observed our small room (just to give you guys an idea, once your open the room’s door, it’s opposite is the bathroom, while on the left was our bunk bed and the cupboard). I scanned and gazed at each and every corner of the room then I noticed that Nica’s bed was empty, with no pillows, no bed sheet, or anything to cover it. Then I go through her cupboard and to my surprise, it was also empty. I was confused as to why did she took all her stuff if she intended to spend a holiday only. Weird but it got weirder when I started to prep for our “afternoon out”. I was searching for my see-through polka blouse but couldn’t find it anywhere. Then I remembered that I promised to bring the camera so I opened the back of my cupboard it was not there. I dug into the pile of clothes only to find that my camera was missing. I searched under the bed, and everywhere to no avail. Then, it sunk in that Nica left along with my other valuables. I started to get hysterical. I called Dan to report the incident. I was crying and screaming when Dan arrived. Dan asked me, “Why do you even keep an expensive camera here?” I was furious because of what he asked, obviously in his tone of voice, he was blaming me. I called my siblings, my boyfriend, and my friends to let them know what happened. My sister advised me to file a police report. I did but it was ironic because the nearest police are only on the corner of the street yet they cannot do anything. Nica was bogus. From what I believed, the name Nica was only an alias. We could not trace her since we do not have her mobile number, her permanent address, not even her Facebook account. Bummer. And that BPO establishment which she said her work was not even there besides the casino. We reviewed the CCTV footage located on the dorm’s gate. Nica left around 5 in the morning, an hour after I left for work. She had all of her stuff with her, big bags, and some. That freaking lady. After that, I discovered that it was not only the camera that she took, but she also got my F21 string bag, some of my dresses and blouses and of course, the money I had in the bag (around USD 40 if converted from PHP to USD). WHAT AN EXPERIENCED ROBBER, RIGHT? I never spoke to Dan after that incident as he was not a big help. At some point, even it’s wrong to impute, I thought that Dan was part of the inside robbery. Who knows what because he already knew Nica even before right? I did not sleep in the dorm that night. I had a lot on my mind. What if her intentions were not the only robbery? What would she do if I was still in the room while plotting her flee? What if her plan was to choke me to death while I was asleep just to get my stuff? I was terrified and a little traumatized so I stayed with my boyfriend. Two days after the incident, I moved out and rented a bigger room, but I decided to rent for myself alone. No sharing and no stranger roommate even it was pricey. I have learned my lesson, I stopped lowering my guard to anyone I am not comfortable with and I’m no longer easily convinced by a friendly person. Some people who are too good to be true are the ones who have hidden intentions (turned out to be true as I encounter different people in different places). So Dan and Nica, let’s never meet again. To Nica, I believe that what came around, comes back around. Karma is real!
Hi guys...Two days ago, I won 45 000 USD on online betting site... The same night, I transferred all of my winnings to online casino and fell down to 1000 USD...With only a couple hands left, I won an insane hand which resulted in 50000 USD in my account. I went to sleep feeling like king (this kind of money is equal to 4 years of average salary in my country). I made a decision to place few relatively smaller bets and cashout 45000 USD and start investing the money and treat myself with few luxuries. Next day, I made a bet of 2000 USD with 30000 possible win. All matches went well, and I only had to wait for Cardinals to beat the Patriots... Whoever watched the game knows that the Cardinals lost in most ludicrous way possible, which made me feel so angry and and furious that I once again transferred all my winnings to casino. I started a gambling spree of few hours which resulted in total blowout. After I lost everything, I even put additional 2000 USD from my savings (which I need for some expenses) and, of course, lost them also... This morning I woke up and the feeling was...I can’t even describe it, some of you probably know it... I haven’t made a lot of damage(most of the money is the winnings from day before), but I feel like I have thrown out the only possibility for a better life. I have always excelled in school, nowadays in business (I am an IT architect for a major company) but I always wanted a chance to try making something myself...of course, the money for starting was always the issue, and yesterday I ruined probably the only chance I will ever get. I called in sick today at work, I can not think or do anything... The only thing that I can think about is committing something foolish to myself. Besides the shame and this previously described feeling, I have enormous fear that this feeling will never go away, that it will drive me insane (or at least get me fired for not doing anything at my work). I do not know how to motivate myself to work when yesterday I lost this amount of money in few hours. What is the point? I also fear that this is something that will turn my addiction in something that is incurable... I just needed a place to vent and write things down, sorry guys and nice to meet you
How to spot the good from the bad ones. I'm sure most of us have been searching endlessly for a reliable Casino that really looks after their customers. So have I and I can easily say it's not an easy task to make heads or tails from. I'm sure you have been searching for different sites and reading reviews about casinos. And still, it's hard to decide where to try your luck. From my personal experience both as a player and a gambler, there are a few key things I have learned to look out for when I decide if I'm going to spend my hard-earned cash on a site. First of all, check if the casino holds a valid license, The ones to look out for are UKGC and MGA licenses. If they have both you are already one step closer to finding a reliable operator. Secondly, check for some reviews on how long they take to pay out a withdrawal, keep in mind a casino is not a bank and they do take a while to process a payment. Usually, it will take between 1 to 3 days. And that is pretty standard in the industry. The key thing to look out for here is, that when you sign up, to get your account verified right away as this will prolong any withdrawal you may request at some point. I have seen that many complain about long processing times for withdrawals. 9 times out of 10 its because of 2 things. The documents have not been submitted or wrong documents have been sent in for review. Here is a top tip to keep in mind when you do decide to sign up and play.
Make sure you have a valid ID. So you can take a photo of it. The whole ID has to show in the photo.
Have a recent official letter or Utility bill no older than 3 months to verify your address. The whole letter has to be visible in the picture in order for it to be accepted.
Only use 1 deposit method that you can easily verify. Such as a Bank card or E-Wallet. As you will just have to take pictures of the Card and for the E-Wallet, you need a screenshot of your E-Wallet account.
Once you have this and you have decided to sign up on a casino of your choice, send the documents in and get the verification done. Saves you a big headache later on. Before you ask why you have to do this. The reason is simple. The casino operates with a license and a part of the legal requirements is to verify each player, it's that simple. Now for the more fun part. Casinos offer a variety of bonuses, right of the bat when you sign up you will get a welcome offer with your first deposit if you want it. Please make sure to read the bonus terms on any bonus you might take as there is no such thing as a free lunch. Should you take a bonus with your deposit or free spins there are always terms and conditions you need to follow. The most prominent ones are wagering requirements and maximum bet allowed. These 2 points can vary a lot between casinos and you should always check what they are before you decide whether or not to take a bonus. For example, Casino A offers you a deposit match bonus of 100% up to 200 Cad, Euro, USD etc. In the bonus terms, the wagering requirement is given and for this example, let's say it is 50X. What does this mean? It is very simple to understand. Let's say you want to use the deposit bonus and you decide to deposit 100 Cad, Euro, USD etc. The casino will then match your deposit and give you an additional 100 as bonus money. This amount comes with the wagering requirement. So in order to complete the wagering make a simple calculation. 100*50 = 5000. This means that the 100 you got in bonus must be played until you have turned over 5000 Cad, Euro, USD etc. Should you complete the wagering and you still have funds left once completed, then the remaining money is yours and you can place a withdrawal. Also, keep in mind the second point I mentioned earlier. When you play with bonus funds you are restricted to a max bet per spin. This is usually 5 Cad, Euro, Usd etc. If you bet higher you breach the terms and any winnings will most likely be taken away from you. And there is nothing you can do about it. Now a more decent wagering requirement is usually 35X and most casinos have this in their terms. Any higher and the wagering becomes almost impossible to complete. One other thing to keep in mind is that some casinos offer sticky bonuses and some don't. The difference here is like night and day. If you get a sticky bonus it means that all funds turn to bonus money at the start when you take a bonus with your deposit and the funds stay that way until the wagering has been completed or you run out of funds. The non-sticky bonuses are the ones you should look out for. Then your money and the bonus money stay in separate pots and you play your real money first. I hope this will aid you in deciding where to sign up if you are looking for a good casino, and I will list 3 of my personal favourites below with signup links as well for your convenience. Captain Spins. https://media.dreamteamaffiliates.com/redirect.aspx?pid=4768&lpid=16&bid=1676 CasiGo. https://media.dreamteamaffiliates.com/redirect.aspx?pid=4769&lpid=27&bid=1779 Jonny Jackpot. https://media.dreamteamaffiliates.com/redirect.aspx?pid=4758&lpid=11&bid=1655 Unfortunately, if you reside in the US you can not sign up. But If you are from Canada or Europe feel free to give them a try. They have amazing bonuses, customer support and their VIP program are one of the best. You won't be disappointed.
Day 1 of Quitting- My story into gambling addiction
Hi everyone, This is my first post so bare with me. It may be long so don’t feel compelled to read it. I am 26 years old and in the midst of the Pandemic, I have been working from home since March. Before September, I would never have thought of myself having a gambling addiction. I remember being on a cruise when I turned 21 and put $20 in a slot machine and lost it and was so angry and disappointed in myself. Then in September I kept seeing this ad on Instagram for an online casino. One day I succumbed and decided to sign-up because they had a $30 signup offer. I thought, ‘Hey what’s the harm?’ I wish I could go back and slap myself and say don’t do it. I play through the free $30 and won $500. My whole body felt electrified. That went away when I realized there were wagering requirements (I have never been in/involved with casinos so I had no idea). By the time I met the wagering requirement, I had $75 of withdrawalable money. Still excited I made $75 for free I went to withdrawal, but found out the minimum withdrawal amount is $100. So I kept playing and eventually lost it. I wish I learned my lesson that this will be the reality most of the time. For a bit of background, before this I was in a decent financial state. Pretty good job for someone my age, lived alone in a nice apartment, had some credit card debt, but overall manageable. I have some mental health problems (Bipolar and anxiety disorders) but received treatment and relatively stable compared to my early 20s. As the days went on I couldn’t stop thinking about seeing that ‘big win’ flashing on my screen and kept thinking to myself, ‘that $500 could have been mine if I didn’t have that $30 bonus’. So, I decided to deposit $20 and bet low on the same game and won nothing. I felt sick like I did on the cruise. This particular online casino gives you $1 every day, so for the next week I just played but $1 and won some, but not enough to withdrawal. About a week later, I got an email from the casino saying if I deposit $50, I’ll get an extra $50 with no wagering requirement. The thought of depositing $50 was crazy to me so I just deleted the email and continued with my free $1 a day. After about a week of that, I get another email, deposit $50 play with $200. I scoured the fine print and I only had to play through the extra $150 once, then any winnings I can withdrawal. I still hesitated until Friday night where I had a couple drinks and decided to go for it. Back then, I would say this was one of the most fun nights of my life. I kept landing the ‘fireshot’ feature and winning mini and minor jackpots. At the end of the night I won $1200 USD (I’m from Canada so it would be about $1500 CAD). My body was so full of excitement I could barely hit the withdrawal button. When I did, I found out they had to verify my account and I had to send in the required documents. After I researched if this was standard for online casinos and researching this casino, I sent in my documents. I went to bed happy, and already had plans on what I was going to buy/pay off with this win. Unfortunately I was too excited to sleep. So I log back in and miraculously (at least to me back then), my $1200 was still there, and playable. So I thought why not play a few more rounds with a higher bet to get an even bigger win? Big mistake. By 3:00am, I was down to $100. I forced myself to stop so I could still withdrawal something. After about a week or two, I resisted playing/betting more and when I logged into my online banking and saw the $120 deposited, I think that’s when my addiction started. I was no longer satisfied with my free $1 everyday. I started just depositing $20 here and there. On my lunch break or in the evening when I was bored. Then $20 turned into $50 and $50 to $100. After maxing my credit card with no significant wins, I decided enough was enough. And stopped for the rest of September. Most likely because I had researched so much about online casinos, I had more ads than ever tempting me. One night again after a few drinks, I joined a different online casino. This one was completely different, with better games, a level up feature where you get to spin a wheel after each level and win free spins, cash back or free money, I was hooked again. I put in $50 and lost and was completely broke. So I patiently counted down the days until I got paid. I also sold about $500 worth of video games/consoles I didn’t want to sell, but did to have more money to gamble with. On payday, I set an alarm for 4:00am when my pay is deposited. This was the first real sign to myself I may be becoming obsessed, but brushed it off. I deposited $100 and won $200. Same story, I had to verify my account but this was done within hours, and I got my money in two days VS a week and a half with my first casino. Stupidly, I put the $200 back in and lost it. I was back to being broke after only two days of getting paid. By the weekend, my credit card payment posted and in my eyes, I had money again. That night I won most of what I lost back and learned my lesson and withdrew it. When I saw that sum deposited into my bank account, I was ecstatic. I first paid off my credit card I was using to make the deposits, and went out and bought AirPods Pro. I felt rich (even though the win was less than $1000). That evening I wanted to play again, but I had no money. This was the night I learned I could cancel a bill payment within 24 hours. Which I did. And played through all my winnings. Words can’t describe how disappointed I was in myself. I was broke. Credit card maxed. And the only thing I had to show for it were the AirPods. The next day I tried returning them but they wouldn’t accept the return because of their return policy on headphones. I vowed to myself to never gamble again, wrote a note in my phone describing what I was feeling so I could read it if I was ever tempted. That week I fell into a depressive episode. I couldn’t afford groceries, lied to friends and family for not spending time with them because I feared they would want to order food, I didn’t want to admit what happened, so I isolated myself. That week was what I thought was the hardest. I just stayed in bed signing up to every casino out there for free spins no deposit sign ups to try to fill the void but you never actually win anything on no deposit spins. Finally, my good friend asked what is going on and I immediately bursted into tears and told her I was broke, and my credit card maxed. We work at the same job, and long story short, are both getting $5000 in retro pay because of a expired union contract. She told me she would lend me $5000 now, and I would give her my retro money when we get it in February. This was one of the kindest things anyone has ever done for me. Reluctantly, I decided to accept this kindness and we worked out a budget on how I would not let this happen again. Here’s the thing, and I will never forgive myself for, I didn’t tell her all this happened because of gambling. I was too ashamed and embarrassed. Life was somewhat normal again for a couple weeks until one night I decide to just put in $100 and see if I can win some of what I now owed my friend back. After $500 lost, those same feelings came back, but worse since I felt I betrayed my friend’s kindness, and that this isn’t the first time this happened. Fast forward to November - I won again (not nearly enough to recover my losses), paid my credit card and cancelled the payment, lost it all again. Then towards the end of November, my $1000 for rent sitting in my savings account kept calling my name. I have never ever been in a position where I would risk not affording rent, but my addiction was stronger and I lost $500 of it. I had about a week until my rent was due, I had nowhere to turn, I couldn’t ask my friend for a loan because in her mind, and from the few times she asked, I was sticking to my budget. My new way of handling stress was gambling, so I put another $100 in and won $600. I was saved and again vowed myself to never put myself into this position again and ‘quit’. Now it is December, I guess this is my rock bottom. Not nearly as bad as some people’s, but here it is. I took out another credit card for ‘emergencies’ since my main one is maxed. I was good, and didn’t use it except to buy a few groceries which I swore I would pay off on payday. My mental health declined, and I deposited $100 and lost it. Then another $100. Lost it. Made another ‘promise’ to myself to stop and I did until last night. I now owe $1,000 on the new credit card, and my main one is now in a negative balance because of a subscription. I am a liar, I take advantage of people’s kindness that I didn’t deserve in the first place, and now in more credit card debt than I know how to deal with. All I can wish for is I’ve learned my lesson. That the money I lost I will never get back, and to find some way to fill the void gambling has left in my life. After only the first day, I don’t know what will give me that feeling of excitement, the feeling of being alive. I had all my casino accounts deleted this morning, but I know there are more out there, I just really hope I can stop myself from ever going back on this path. If you made it this far thank you for reading. If you have any suggestions on what I can do to not relapse, and any hobbies or activities that can fill the void please let me know.
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